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Monkeys are sooooo last year

As sad as many of us will be to bid farewell to 2016’s Year of the Monkey, say goodbye we must. Monkeys are sooooo last year. This year is all about the Rooster. They’re out there, you know. Disgusting slobs, anal neat freaks, raging racists, pathological liars, pneumatic sex machines, unhousebroken sleepwalkers you name it, somebody’s had to live with it. And though it might make the rest of our lives easier if they were actually lurking beneath bridges and down dark alleyways with their telltale snarling faces, hunched shoulders and hands curled up into menacing little claws they’re not that easy to spot.

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